Natalie Portman- the Sita Squid from the Doordharshan episode of the Ramayan that you missed- Carmensita- by Devendra Banhart

Is it offensive? Is it cute? Uh? My lofty minded cultural theory teacher once told me “if its silly its not orientalism” well that certainly “cleared things up” for me by making them less comprehensible- uh I don’t know and I don’t really care- I think people decide to be offended if its convenient for them to do so- so they have something to bitch about instead of focusing on their pointless, culturally bereft, insignificant existences- so I mean- so if it pissed you off why dont you go and make your own fucking video- as for me- I thought the guy- Devendra (Natalie’s current boytoy) was kind of hairy- I thought the makeup was nice- I thought the chic playing the slutty version of Kali at the end was not nearly a hot as I imagine kali would be in person- I thought Natalie did a really stupid imitation of indian dance- I mean even the extras were better- but I thought the beastiality with the squid was very sexy after the whole Sita sati and added just that missing trope that would have made the original Ramayana that much better. So check it out. And can someone explain the lyrics if you know spanish- cuz I don’t exactly see the relationship between the video and the music. anyway…enjoy-

Invoking the cosmic wonder of his beard and Bollywood, Devendra Banhart’s latest music video is both a love story and a tongue-in-cheek nod to India’s maharajas of yore. In “Carmensita,” the newest single from his latest album, Smokey Rolls Down Thunder Canyon, Devandra and his uber-hot (and unlikely girlfriend) Natalie Portman get down to psychedelic-indie, all while saving the Kindom of Carmensita from the clutches of Lord Rajan the Malevolent. When taunting the Prince (played by Devendra), Lord Rajan bellows, “You think you can defeat me with your rebellious beard?” Later on, Devendra kills Lord Rajan by shooting venomous snakes out of his forehead. This is arguably 2008’s most badass moment in music videos.

from zimbio.com

Snoop Dogg wears a turban- Singh is King!

this song features RDB (Rhythm, Dhol, Bass), Snoop Doggy Dogg, and Akshay Kumar- it’s from the Motion Picture, Singh is King, starring Akshay Kumar. By the way the song is the best part of the film, which is otherwise a piece of excrement.

image from worth1000

Manmohan Singh tells Advani to change his astrologers- lol-

So…the government hasn’t toppled, and to celebrate- Manmohan Singh “sympathizes” with Advani by calling him a old timer who’s been led astray by his astrologers:

NEW DELHI: Prime Minister Manmohan Singh on Tuesday took a sharp dig at Bharatiya Janata Party (BJP) leader L.K. Advani saying he had made “at least three attempts to topple our government… but on each occasion his astrologers have misled him”.

“This pattern, I am sure, will be repeated today,” the prime minister said in his reply to the two-day debate on the vote of confidence in his government. The prime minister, however, could not deliver his speech due to repeated heckling by the opposition and copies of his address were distributed.

Recalling that Advani had repeatedly described him as the “weakest prime minister” and a “nikamma (useless) PM”, Manmohan Singh said with uncharacteristic vitriol: “At his ripe old age (Advani is 81), I do not expect Shri Advani to change his thinking. But for his sake and India’s sake, I urge him at least to change his astrologers so that he gets more accurate predictions of things to come.”

from newindpress

Biggest Gay Pride March in India’s History, June 2008

BBC clip:

Its insane when you actually stop and think about how fucked up India still is about homosexuality- you’d think everyone could get over this prudish Victorian wet dream and enjoy the fact of the extreme range of diversity that has been and continues to be an integral part of its history- but nope- if you’re gay, not only do you have to contend with either staying in the closet indefinitely (faking a hetero marriage) or the fact that the basic day to day parts of life can involve people treating you like shit if you’re open about your sexuality (building societies refusing to rent you a place/ families bullying you/trouble with careers etc) but you also have to worry about the fact that the actual act of having sex with the people you desire could result in your being thrown in jail- especially if you come from lower economy communities- and on top of that- having a higher risk of getting AIDS because there are so few healthy scenes where people of these communities can actually practice safe sex- for you heteros out there- imagine a world where every time you felt like bonking- you had to ask yourself whether it was worth getting thrown into jail for it- or dieing of AIDS.

It irritates the hell out of me when I think about how many people I know have led such fucked up lives because of this Nazi bullshit.

For a city of 14 million people, a gathering of a couple of hundred may seem minuscule. But for Delhi’s gay community, the turnout at their first-ever Queer Pride this Sunday was beyond belief. Over 500 marchers carrying rainbow-colored flags and “Queer Dilliwalla” banners marched to bhangra beats, breaking into Bollywood-style pelvic thrusts and bust-heaving from time to time. Starting from Barakhamba Road in the heart of the city’s business district — at which point the media seemed to outnumber the marchers — they walked 2 km to Jantar Mantar, an 18th century astronomical observatory that has become the unlikely hub of sundry protests in India’s capital. Along the way, they were joined by NGO workers and advocates of all causes, droves of tourists and resident expatriates, and a handful of curious onlookers, all shouting “British Law Quit India!” They were evoking the famous slogan from India’s freedom struggle, but referring here to Section 377 of the Indian Penal Code, which was introduced by the British to criminalize sexual acts “against the order of nature.” Perhaps even more unexpectedly, few marchers wore masks — which the organizers had provided for those who haven’t come out — and there were no protests from religious or socially conservative groups. “This is amazing,” said Ranjit Monga, a public relations executive, “No one would’ve believed 10 years ago a gay parade was possible in Delhi.”

for the full story go to Time

BLACKBERRY’s Indian BIG Brother

image from bbgeeks

Oye- I’ve been wanting to buy me one of those little gremlins- not so sure anymore- oh well- I guess its just as bad as anyone holding an American passport- do you know they have little tracking devices in those things these days? You can smash it with a hammer if you like. Anyway, here’s the find on why Blackberries piss of the Indian secret service:

The reason you may not be able to get a BlackBerry in the very near future in India is that the Indian government is not comfortable that it can’t lawfully snoop on its citizens’ e-mails, since there are no BlackBerry servers owned by Research In Motion (RIM) that handle the e-mail inside the country. TechGadgets is reporting that the revelation came from Tata Services, which had requested to offer BlackBerry handhelds in India, but was denied that request due to the security concerns of the government.

I’d understand if Indian officials said they were uncomfortable with the notion of government officials using the device, since the e-mail servers processing the information were not in India; but that’s not what it is saying, according to the TechGadget’s article. It is saying the BlackBerry can’t be offered because the content of those handhelds can’t be monitored. That’s breathtaking.

Talk about Big Brother. If I was a citizen of India, then I’m not sure I would want a BlackBerry based on the revelation. Heck, now that I think of it, I wouldn’t want any push e-mail service offered in India. After all, in order to clear the Indian government’s approval process it would of had to provide a way to monitor the e-mail.

I won’t be surprised if RIM offers a solution to address India’s concern. After all, RIM wants its BlackBerry handhelds in India. At the end of the day, I suppose if you have nothing to hide perhaps you wouldn’t mind picking one up if they are offered. Just be prepared to have all of your e-mails from the device monitored and accessible, though.

from geek.com by Brian Osborne

Hot auntie phone sex- Goodness Gracious Me-

for you perverts out there- this is not porn-

Savita Bhabhi- finally some Indian Manga porn

If you haven’t seen it yet- you just have to! Its like an online illustrated pornographic answer to “Goodness Gracious Me”. Savita Bhabhi been doing the rounds when it arrived in my Mr.’s inbox from the usual suspects, and perhaps some sense of incredulity that it in fact, actually exists, prevented me from sticking it up- but as all and sundry seem to have seen it by now (that is to say every male in India) I may as well post it-

As usual it has elicited the standard moral uproar – media as corrupting influence upon the youth of our nation etc.-

GreatBong:

A new menace is here, an insidious agent of malignancy that creeps silently into your bedrooms (and yes even offices when the boss is not around). Assuming the form of electron streams, it activates pixels on your computer screen with certain poisonous RGB values which, before you know, sap you of your morals, your humanity and also more than a bit of your energy.

As articulated beautifully by an outraged Netizen, a person who suggests the CBI to step in to arrest the content creators of the site.

In my opinion this site is more dangerous than a normal adult site since it targets young Indian audience and degrades women.

I agree. Most normal adult sites do not target younger audiences and depict women as fully-rounded individuals with feelings as opposed to just a composition of attractive body parts.

There appears to be some sort of mystery regarding the hidden identity of the two guys who invented Savita Bhabhi and her website, and suspicious speculation regarding whether or not these guys are from India. It seems like the curiosity surrounding this suggests that for most people a joke cannot stand without clarity about the ethnicity of the comedians. If they are white guys then it may mean that a potentially self-reflexive parody of Saas-Bahu middle class morality combined with fresh wank material- becomes contaminated suddenly by the gaze of two white cyber geeks- for the sensitive patriotic wanker its like the moment when you realize that sexkitten69 is really an old pedophile named Edgar. And the flag goes suddenly to half mast at the thought of yet another diabolical act of cultural appropriation- which invariably brings out the “older brother syndrome” in even the most testosterone poisoned of patriots-
(she may be a toon but she’s still our Bhabhi and only we get to fantacize about her cup size you bloody Caucasian hemorrhoid)

here’s a link to an article on it with Tehelka,

Savita Bhabhi is growing to be a phenomenally popular pornographic comic strip. It has grown solely by word of mouth to 3911 registered users in little over a month since its inception. The lead character has been drawn with every Kserial bahu trapping firmly in place: the dull gleam of a mangalsutra, sindoor forming a bright contrast to long dark hair parted chastely down the middle.

The bhabhi angle is a clever one. It combines an astute reading of the Indian sensibility with the ability to poke it in the eye. Graphic novelist Sarnath Banerjee is writing a book tentatively titled Libido, that will include factofiction tales of sexuality in India. He says, “Writing good pornography, or erotica, needs rigour and an understanding of humanity. You are an anthropologist looking at socio-psychology.” And Indians have a head start at being creative here since, Banerjee says, “You have to be repressed to write good pornography. For me, I was fascinated when I saw these prostitutes in Amsterdam, coming as I did from the usual anal middle class and its protected environment where sexy was Ms Peters, the geography teacher.”

The message boards on the website are rhapsodic in their unanimous approval of this venture by Messrs Deshmukh, Dexstar, and Mad. (Deshmukh writes the scripts while Dexstar and Mad do the artwork and design). One is curious about the identities of this suspiciously anglicised sounding group. From the message boards we glean that the animators are happy to read unsolicited scripts written by fans but that they have to be in English as they don’t understand Hindi. Given that the context within which they are trying to operate is making it hip to be Hindi, this is curious. On the one hand, their work seems meant for mass consumption by people who read bhasha erotica; on the other, it makes fun of the stereotypes those brigades enjoy.

On the subject of repression- Sarnath makes an interesting point- reminds me of a certain friend who used to frenetically draw deranged pornographic pictures as a kid to cope with the monotony of small town living and the occasional erotic encounter with the bearded version of Mrs. Robinson or the fat girl next door. And I think the whole anthropological side of it is definitely there too- if you want to get an insight into another culture- watch their porn first- if Savita Bhabhi gives you a sense of where incest prohibition in a large extended families creates a country full of men who desperately want to gouge their eyes out or screw their cousin sisters (perhaps the later before the former) then Japanese Hentai gives you a sense that rape is pretty much the way romance is imagined, after the chocolate and roses have been put aside- from various accounts through the testosterone grape-vine- Japanese women feel that they are required to scream throughout the experience and cry if possible. charming.