image from religiousfreaks
Ok so you believe in God or you don’t…in any case weird things happen in India that defy explanation…such as trees that take on the shape of the sculpture of Ganesh or the Goddess Tara…and statues and paintings that bleed from the eyes or drink milk. Sure…you can try and come up with an explanation and people have done so…but ultimately it takes a leap of faith to choose to interpret those events one way or the other…it takes some degree of blind faith to be an atheist. Me? Oh no no…I think the aliens did it. We’re all part of one large experiment conducted by white mice from outer space to decipher the meaning of life only…they’re all college students in the middle of their intergalactic Phd’s and they got bored half-way through their theses…so now they’re just fucking with us.
So here are some mysteries from the “God” files…
First off we have…(drum roll please): the famous Shiva Statue that drinks milk…now that is some seriously weird stuff…and the fact that this kind of thing happens simultaneously to a lot of people in different houses across India…its like when Yuri Gellar got people to hold up spoons in front of the television and managed to bend them all during that broadcast…how do you explain it? It’s the mice I tell you.
Shiva drinks milk:
Rikshaw driver converts to Judaism in Bombay after a Rabbi gave his dead pregnant wife something to drink which caused her corpse to deliver his son…who is sitting with him in the video! He tells the story in English while sitting in a synagogue.
The Rikshaw Driver Miracle:
And in the Village of Erumali, Kerala, in the Church of Saint Mary’s…the eyes of the painting of Maria Rosa Mystica began to bleed. And where this happened a women who had brain cancer was instantly cured! Actually she just had an alien mouse stuck in her ear. It was quite sad because he crawled in there after a drinking binge and suffocated later causing the other members of his death metal band, Anonymouse, Euronymouse, and Mouseferatu, to write a song about him for their new “The White Mice” album called “Cheesus Saves”…click on the cheese to see that clip. “cheese” (image from monotremata )
Maria Rosa Mystica:
Ok and this is an attempt in Seattle, to convince everyone that a snow-man melted miraculously into the form of the Lord Ganesh. This NRI dad is just trying to impress his kid but I think that’s pretty cool…I mean Hindu Desi kids don’t really get a chance to believe in Santa Claus so why not believe in miracle snow men that look like Ganesh instead?
Ganesh the Snow Man:
Heh heh…I do believe in Santa I do believe in Santa…I’m sending him some addresses of some GOOD friends of mine…
image from badsanta